June 19, 2018

It’s not that I am purposely trying to misbehave. I do want to behave and I do want to listen to you!
But sometimes, you tell me every second, of every minute of every day what to do, who could listen to that.
Would you be able to handle that if someone told you what to do every minute? Daddy, I see you get annoyed every time mommy tries to tell you what to do? Haha yes I know I’m 4, but I do see things.
Would you be able to handle that if someone told you what to do every minute? Daddy, I see you get annoyed every time mommy tries to tell you what to do? Haha yes I know I’m 4, but I do see things.
You always say to me, please behave, I would if I could, I want to listen to you but then something happens to me and takes over my body. It’s just that I’m not old enough and I don’t have the words to tell you what’s bothering me, so my behavior is telling you what’s bothering me.
I need you to understand that my behavior is communicating and telling you what’s wrong, but I don’t know what’s wrong, and I don’t know how to tell you, so you have to help me.
You have to say “maybe your feelings are hurt” and I’ll say “no it’s nothing”.
You have to say “maybe you’re angry” and I’ll say “I don’t know”, you have to help me and it’ll probably be years before I could figure out what I’m feeling.
But you have to keep trying till I am 10 and then I can tell you once in a while.
But I’m young now and need to learn my feelings words.
And you will know you guessed the right feeling if my mood or my behavior gets better or my expression changes.
Then you will know that you got it right.
I wish I could just say what I’m feeling, I wish I could know what I was feeling, but even adults don’t know what they feel a lot of the time.
I wish I could just say what I’m feeling, I wish I could know what I was feeling, but even adults don’t know what they feel a lot of the time.
You wouldn’t expect me to all of a sudden just know how to read without teaching me, right? So I am not going to know how I feel and then on top of that know how to tell you.
Please teach me, but maybe you don’t know how to teach me about my feelings, do you know how?
When you take me to the park to play It looks like I’m having a good time and I’m probably having a good time . I’m running around having fun And kids need that.
But if you’re sitting on the bench on your phone and you’re not playing with me, Then when we get home and it’s time to go to bed or take a bath I’m not going to want to . I may throw something and you’ll say that came out of the blue stop it.
But you didn’t say I see you threw something maybe you have a feeling that’s bothering, you maybe you missed me in the park, maybe I was on my phone too much. Let’s say the words instead of throwing something.
I missed you, I wanted to play with you, I felt jealous of the phone and I did not know how to say play with me.
I need you to pay attention to me .
I’m just a kid I want to have fun with you your my mom you’re my dad why are you on the phone.
I don’t know how to say that all I know how to do is miss behave you need to teach me .
When I am at School all day and I come home and I run around and I break things I don’t know how to tell you that my friend didn’t play with me or took my toy.
I don’t know how to tell you that my teacher was grumpy and makes me think they don’t like me.
I don’t know how to tell you that I missed you all day and that I need special attention to feel better. I need to talk about these things so I don’t miss behave.
I don’t know how to tell you that it’s very hard to sit still it’s a very long day in school.
I’m just a kid I need to play .
When I push my sister I’m just trying to say get out a My Space or I’m jealous you pay so much attention to her or it’s hard to share or I used to be the youngest and I’m not anymore that hurts .
You need to help me you need to help me to tell you what’s the matter.
And yes I need you to tell me all the wonderful things I do and tell me positive things and ask me to do things in a nice way instead of punishing me .
but I really really need you to help me figure out the feelings that are hiding in my behavior that is what will really make me feel better.
But maybe you don’t know how to do that Cause I’m thinking most parents don’t know how to do that but you can call someone and learn how to do that Can’t you?
Help me tell you I miss you help me tell you I need more Attention. Help me tell you I’m not the baby anymore and you’re paying so much attention to the new baby, that hurts a lot.
And all those feelings push-up on my body and makes my arm hit or makes me bite or makes me scream.
Help me with these hard feelings tell me it’s a hard feeling to have, tell me you know it’s not easy and you’re sorry that’ll help me feel better.
And then help me find new ways to do things have special time with me .
I’ll tell you more later I have to go miss behave now because You’re busy reading this 🙂
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